BDSM and kink has a rich and complicated history. It is ever evolving both in the community and to the individual practitioner as well. BDSM overall, means different things to different people. Again, the only rules that hold true is that each person has their own unique rules and practices. Many equate BDSM and specifically D/s to be sexual in nature, demeaning to women, or predatory but often that can be farthest from the actual truth. BDSM goes deeper into our mental and emotional side as opposed to just the kink. Both kink and BDSM have deep roots in history. Neither of which I knew about prior to my research for this post.
The term BDSM itself is an acronym mashup of several terms with the location of the slash moving each time:
The earliest written history of the kink side of BDSM starts in Mesopotamia. A time when gods and monsters ruled. Goddess Inanna would literally whip her human followers into a sexual frenzy. If this is the known start of BDSM then it is one of the ultimate expressions of feminism. Can you think of anything more empowering than a bad ass goddess of sexual pleasure?
BDSM continues into Ancient Greece where Spartan boys were willingly whipped as described in a translated Ancient Greek text:
“The boys in Sparta were lashed with whips during the entire day at the altar of Artemis Orthia, frequently to the point of [expiration], and they bravely endured this, cheerful and proud, vying with one another for the supremacy as to which of them could endure being beaten for the longer time and greater number of blows. And the one who was victorious was held in especial repute.”
Romans had the tomb of flogging (whipping) where women would whip each other in celebration.
And even the Kama sutra has sections on passionate slapping and biting:
“The place of striking with passion is the body, and on the body the special places are: The shoulders, the head, the space between the breasts, the back, the jaghana, or middle part of the body, the sides […] striking is of four kinds: Striking with the back of the hand, striking with the fingers a little contracted, striking with the fist, striking with the open palm of the hand.”
“[S]ometimes carried away by passion, a woman puts aside her natural temperament and acts the part of the man by slapping and beating him or play fighting with him […] she at the height of excitation becomes hard and fearless and dominates.”
“[A woman should] take hold of her lover by the hair, and bend his head down, and kiss his lower lip, and then, being intoxicated with love, she should shut her eyes and bite him in various places […] when her lover shows her any mark that she may have inflicted on his body, she should smile at the sight of it, and turning her face as if she were going to chide him, she should show him with an angry look the marks on her own body that have been made by him. Thus if men and women act according to each other’s liking, their love for each other will not be lessened even in one hundred years.”
A main theme and message in many of these cultures is actually less about sex/kink and more about finding oneself, learning about and taking responsibility, camaraderie, and not giving a crap what others think.
The current and prevalent taboo attitudes towards sexuality are actually a modern notion. A sexual repression of what it means to be human. Almost every culture has a history of BDSM. The Kamasutra teaches men to respect women, and women to respect men, because the goal is liberation from this world. The Greeks equated sex to be a way to exchange truth and learning. Flagellation was especially popular throughout the Middle Ages. Not only as a way to atone for perceived sin, it was also documented as a means of sexual pleasure. In Europe, from the 16th-19th century there were many works of literature focused around sadism and masochism.
The term Sadism was coined from an 18th century French nobleman, Marquis de Sade. Sade was a philosopher who became notorious for acts of perceived sexual cruelty in his writings as well as in his own life.
On the flip side of that coin, Masochism is derived from Austrian writer Leopold von Sacher-Masoch. His work included spanking and other sexual proclivities in his stories.
Origins of modern BDSM are attributed to three sources, mentioned as “European Fetish” (from 1928), “American Fetish” (from 1934), and “Gay Leather” (from 1950). Another source are the sexual games played in brothels, which go back to the 19th century, if not earlier.
After World War 2 a leather biker culture and gay underground scene rose. Men returned home from the horrors of war and brought with them the camaraderie of the field and the rituals of a military lifestyle. Simultaneously pop culture icons such as Betty Paige and other pinups brought sexuality to the forefront of American minds.
An unspoken list of rules from the old guard as told by Master Kuldrin, his site can be found in citations at the bottom of this post.
- About attire
- Always wear boots, butch ones, and preferably black.
- Always wear a wide black leather belt plain, not fancy
- Never mix brown leather with black leather.
- Never mix chrome or silver trim with gold or brass trim.
- Long pants only, Levi’s or leather, and no shorts.
- Chaps indicate more commitment than Levi’s, and leather pants more commitment than chaps, especially when worn consistently.
- Leather Jackets must have epaulets (bike riders excepted).
- Bottoms may not own collars unless a particular Top has allowed that bottom to be the custodian of the Top’s collar. A bottom wearing a collar is a slave, and belongs to the owner of the collar who, presumably, has the keys. Other Tops are not to engage a collared bottom in conversation, but other bottoms may do so. Should such a relationship end, the collar must be returned to the Top.
- Head gear is reserved for Tops or experienced or heavy bottoms only.
- Never touch the bill of a bike cap, including your own.
- Never touch another man’s cap (or head gear) unless you are very intimate friends or lovers.
- Keep studs and other decorations to a tasteful minimum unless they happen to be club insignia.
- Never wear another man’s leather unless he puts it on you.
- Leather, other than boots and belt, must be ‘earned’ through the achievement of successively challenging ‘scenes.’
- Wearing gloves is reserved for heavy players, glove fetishists or bike riders.
- Always indicate SM preference, only with keys left or right.
- If you are cruising seriously, wear the keys out; if not seriously, tuck them in a back pocket. Always indicate strictly leather sex or ‘rough sex’ interest by wearing no keys at all.
- ‘Full’ leather is reserved for after 10:00 P.M. only and only with ‘our own kind’.
- Those who ‘switch’ are second class players and not to be taken as seriously because they haven’t made their minds up. If you must switch, do so in another town.
- Respect the public by wearing less of it during the day.
- About socializing and cruising:
- Experience in the Scene determines social seniority (Top or bottom) , not age, not size, not amount of leather worn, and not offices held in organizations, awards received or titles won.
- Tops and experienced bottoms should be accorded higher respect and deference unless and until they behave rudely–all are expected to observe rules of social courtesy-bad manners are inexcusable and can lower one’s status in the Scene (thereby reducing access to the Knowledgeable People for information or play)
- Real Leathermen keep their word: they do not borrow or lend money; they conduct their affairs with honor and integrity-they don’t lie.
- Preliminary social contact should be on the formal side.
- ‘Senior Persons’ (Top or bottom) are not to be interrupted when in conversation
- Experience being equal, Tops lead the conversation
- Junior Tops defer to Senior Tops and Senior bottoms in social situations.
- NEVER over-indulge in drugs or alcohol in public, or otherwise attract scornful attention to one’s self–to do so brings dishonor on the men in the Scene.
- Junior bottoms defer to all others in the Scene but not to outsiders.
- When walking together, bottoms walk half-a-step behind and to the left of Tops with whom they are involved or playing.
- It is up to the Top or the experienced bottom to extend a hand to invite a handshake. (All touching is highly restricted during initial contact between strangers.)
- Tops should always have the first two opportunities to make verbal or physical contact.
- The more submissive one is, the less direct eye contact one makes-glance frequently at or stare at His boots only when cruising; less so in non-sexual conversation. The more dominant one is, the more direct the eye contact is unless there is no erotic interest (cruising only).
- Men in the Scene do not discuss (or write about) the Scene with outsiders. All men in the Scene must be able to spot outsiders with the ‘right stuff’ and be ready to facilitate them into the Scene after they indicate sincere interest.
- Erotic technical information is only shared among peers.
- Maintain formal and non-committal relationships with those outside the scene; avoid contact with feminine men. Women are not allowed although Senior People may occasionally have intellectual or brief social relationships with the occasional qualified kinky woman, but only in private.
If you’re familiar with BDSM high protocols I’m sure you can see that many of them have their roots in the original rituals of the old guard.
BDSM practices thrived during the birth of the internet and brought many underground scenes to the forefront of acceptable sexuality. With an increased ability to connect anonymously online, the BDSM scene continued to expand exponentially.
As BDSM becomes less taboo it continues to creep into mainstream society. Some American universities—such as Indiana University and Michigan State University—have professors who research and take classes on BDSM.
Today, BDSM is now used as a catch-all phrase covering a wide range of activities, forms of interpersonal relationships, and distinct subcultures. BDSM communities generally welcome anyone with a non-normative streak who identifies with the community; this may include cross-dressers, body modification enthusiasts, animal roleplayers, rubber fetishists, and others.
There are so many more nuances to the history of fetish and BDSM. One could spend a lifetime unraveling it’s intricacies. I encourage you to check out some of the links I’ve dropped below.
- Citations, credit, and thanks are due to the following sources for my information:
- https://www.google.com/amp/s/observationdeck.kinja.com/bdsm-culture-through-history-and-to-the-present-maybe-1685471371/amp
- https://kuldrinskrypt.com/the-old-guard-history-kink-protocol-and-bdsm-s01e42
- https://www.evilmonk.org/a/oldguard.cfm
- https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dominance_and_submission
- https://www.wikiwand.com/en/Collar_(BDSM)
- https://www.biography.com/writer/marquis-de-sade
- https://historymsu.wordpress.com/2017/04/26/the-extended-history-of-bdsm/
- http://penelope.uchicago.edu/Thayer/E/Roman/Texts/Plutarch/Moralia/Instituta_Laconica*.html
- https://m.ranker.com/list/discipline-and-dominance-origins/melissa-sartore
- https://sluttygirlproblems.com/guide/tale-old-time-bdsm-throughout-history/#.WLZHzm_sLIU
- https://psychology.wikia.org/wiki/Domination_and_submission_(BDSM)
- https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Leopold_von_Sacher-Masoch
- https://www.dailyxtra.com/a-brief-history-of-bdsm-64994
- https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/BDSM
Becoming her 